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Men can be self-disciplined, hardworking, and driven. But if we lack vision, any desire to contribute toward a lasting impact with our lives will remain limited. We must move beyond ourselves and learn to serve others in need. I share these insights to the vision for my life not from a position of self-righteousness, but rather to inspire you along your journey to reveal your best self.
For years, I took great pride in my physical and mental abilities to persevere and work harder than other men. When I exercised at the gym, I pushed myself to demonstrate to others that I aligned my identity with the code of masculinity. Once I determined that I was ready to pursue a doctoral degree, I fought myself and others to persevere despite strong opposition.
I was on a mission to validate my self-worth as a man in a society that often limited the potential of those like me due to our race and gender.
Despite a significant amount of growth from my teenage years—when I began to work out to my current role as a father—there is a part of me that continues to identify with dominant masculine behavioral norms. I continue to take great pride in exercise and the appearance of looking strong. Although I am very loving toward my sons, my daughter receives a double dose of my love and affection.
I continue to push myself further and further for progress in my work. Much has changed, and some things remain the same.
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At some point in school, teachers force-fed me the notion of meritocracy. I swallowed the belief that working hard is the predecessor for every accomplishment in life. In college, I became a socially-conscious young man and regurgitated meritocracy through my awareness of how inequalities can influence a person’s ability to develop a work ethic. I believe this awareness that started in undergrad shaped the purposes and reasons I live for on this day, while living abroad with my family in Mexico.
Before Tuesday of last week, I did not use social media to share a scope of the vision that I believe was sent to me by The Creator. Sure, I have posted plenty of pictures, videos, excerpts from my articles, and other types of content. But how they fit together to transform my dream from the intangible to tangible did not appear on my Facebook wall or Instagram feed.
Last week, I decided, it was time to share more about my divine dream to align it with reality, attract accountability, and as an intentional practice of vulnerability.
My ultimate integrated business lifestyle includes writing, consulting, traveling, personal development coaching, teaching Capoeira, and spending ample time with my family. It resembles the ownership of a well-financed exercise facility (located in the US or Mexico), where I teach Capoeira to students who are primarily from underserved communities. Their tuition and uniform fees are covered through scholarships, writing projects, vlog sponsorships, coaching clients, and the monthly trips I take for consultant work. In this exercise facility, I will have an office where I dedicate time every day to writing, creating video content, and studying my crafts.
Although my business will require long hours, it will remain close to my house so I can schedule the time to be home every day when my children return from school. It goes without saying that my partner will play a significant role in keeping this business prosperous, while building an empire related to her own interests.
The vision that I have for my life is big, and it is possible.
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There will come a day when I will open the doors to the facility I own. It will serve young people and adults from underserved communities. Due to the individualistic and systemic structure of racism, families impacted by state-sponsored homicides like that of Stephon Clark, loved ones will benefit from my services.
Together we will bring more awareness to social injustices and devise methods to create pathways toward solutions.
The vision for my life is directed by values consistent with making a positive impact in the lives of people who have limited resources. I support the disruption of masculinity constructs that prevent boys from maturing into the full scope of manhood.
It’s important for me, and I want to encourage you, to serve as a beacon of hope in communities with residents who are underserved due to race, gender, sexual orientation, poverty, or other factors that too often influence social inequalities.
As I took time this week to recognize the vision for my life, I encourage you to do the same. If you need help in this area, explore the resources in this course and let’s connect.
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Photo Credit: Getty Images
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